Trust me on this one

We go through life, stumbling, faltering, rejoicing, grieving and most of all learning.

Every interaction, is a lesson - a lesson is in the journey of life. An important lesson we learn along the way is trust. I feel babies have it right. They trust their care giver, in most cases, their mother. Then comes daddy dearest and the rest of the people follow. The logic is simple – mommy dedicates her day to the baby. Her routine is centered around the needs of the little human. She makes sure that the baby is comfortable, clean and fed. It’s as simple as that.

And then, the baby grows up, learns parameters of society and his existence and learns that trust may be based on more than food, hygiene and a soothing voice to croon you to sleep at night. Trust takes on a more ‘adult’ meaning and that is where the problem begins.

That friend who stole his eraser because blue appealed more to him than the green eraser his mum bought him, that teacher who always smiled at him in the morning, could not cause she had paper correction on her mind, that classmate who ratted him out cause he did not want his parents called to the school. All came together changed his perception of trust.

Moving on in life, he learns trust in the form of different relationship – from friends to colleagues, from siblings to lovers, from parents to superiors, from teachers to neighbours – everyone teach him a thing or two about trust. Now he has so much more to consider when he trusts someone.

It isn’t about physical comfort or honesty only anymore. It now becomes about whether telling someone something matters. Whether he will be judged or helped, whether he will be laughed at or laughed with, whether people will sympathise or empathise. He begins to doubt his own judgment and lets it be clouded by all the possible ifs and buts. He stutters and stammers and is confused about who he can trust.

Questions buzz through his brain. How will my lover respond? What will my mother think? What if my father gets angry? What if people stop being friends with me? Will people think I am lame? What if word spread? What if I a wrong?

This is the stumbling and floundering he goes through in life. If he is lucky, he gets over his insecurities, mans up and puts his trust in one person or more. Sometimes, the gamble pays off and life seems less bumpy for a while. If things don’t go his way, he is back to stumbling and may even lose his way for a while.

Maybe this is life’s way of teaching him that of the people he needs to trust in life, his self comes foremost. Once he learns this lesson, things may seem tad easier, questions a little less daunting and decisions clearer. But till he learns this lesson, he continues to struggle and stumble through this journey called life.

The only solace is that no one has emerged a total winner in the game of life, but then, no one’s come out of it alive as well.

Trust me on this one.